Ivory Tower

MatchesOnFire:Welcome to the Ivory Tower-

Kayne: Yo matches, I'ma gonna let yo finish but Kimg Jong-il has the best chat room of ALL TIME.

Owner and Rules
The current owner of Ivory Tower is Rogerette, who has owned the room since January of 2009.

Rogerette says: "There are three Rules of Ivory Tower.

1. Don't be a dickhead. 2. We are not "Kongredate". No mush. 3. Don't be a dickhead.

If you need rules 1. or 3. explained, chances are you won't like it here, but feel free to ask."

Marb says: "There are 3 Reg Rules of Ivory Tower as well.

1. Don't try to be cool, cause you'll fail. 2. If you don't get something and no one explains, drop it cause they're idiots anyway. 3. If you aren't in a conversation and you enter and don't get it, don't try to."

Gabe says: "Umm... hi mom! Oh, rules...

1. Try to have semi-understandable grammar. 2. Eat mor chiken! 3. No more posting of the lemonparty link!"

Moderators
Rogerette Rogerette is the main and most active moderator, and also the room Owner. She doesn't talk constantly, but she is on and watching when she can, and the Ivory Tower loves her. =]

Crysanna She is a Runescape addict and moderates the game chat on there. She is more active on Runescape than in the Ivory Tower.

Very Active
charity236 Dubbed the room sweetheart by Thor and Jake, Charity tries to be nice to everyone (keyword tries - don't get her angry). Can take a while to get her talking, but once she starts... Real good mates with Mint and Thor, and likes shooting zombies with the guys.

intreker05 This police recruit will beat you both ways to Sunday before you get an insult in edgeways, but Intreker's really quite tame if you can string two brain cells together in your conversation...(she also likes beer and watches sports :O, the most manly woman eva.)

Kool16 Read the name. That's all there is to it.

Marbaba When she's in a bad mood she's relatively calm. That can be an advantage... or it can bring boredom to the tower. Warning: She bites, pounces and tackles. She also goes all Tae Kwon Do and smartass on some people. Don't get on her bad side. Often mistaken for a guy. Likes smilies. xD Happy birthday marb! Hope you have a good one. :D

Morgan133 A shit speller, a "freemanmason", and a harnesser of the power of sensibility, Morgan is a whiz with time zones and will take the Troll Slam-Dunk (especially when set up by Thor.)

Mint_ She is a regular with somewhat of a temper, but controls it well. She started on a less gender neutral account (No name mentioned) and changed it to a more gender neutral name so there wouldn't be 12 year old stalkers all the time XD. *facedesk*! (responds to "angry chinchilla")

opiatejake The King of the Ivory Tower. He doesn't take crap from no one, but is still funny and cool. He makes jokes often when he isn't idle. Also good buds with Kool, Meat & Thor. (together they do bad things 0.o)

Rockin_Gabe He's 6'5" and weighs less than 160 lbs, a "scrawny little pasty white kid" as Thor calls him. He listens to music 24/7, mostly techno. Giant grammar cop, and seems to have spasms with the mute button. Don't get him mad, or he'll... actually, he'll do nothing.

queen9223 isn't lame enough to write about herself -.-

thor0486 Pals with Jake and a real troll stomper, Thor's razor wit and sarcastic remarks cause trolls to fear him and certain lazy Moderators to love him. Arrives to commiserate with the summons, "So, Metallica's sold out..." Also enjoys Cake The cake is a lie, the band. But when it comes to political debates (Health care plan ftw!) and owning trolls there's no better.

XSoulHeadshotX The Welshy of the room, she has a profound knowledge of space and most things that connect to that. Also a very successful troll.

Mildly Active
ajfriss A frequenter of the chat, ajfriss enjoys being sadistic, and is the room's resident insane person. Often late at night starts talking very sophisticatedly. Nicknamed Afro for unknown reasons. Also is going to die of lung cancer.

BlackBone Always BB, never 'Bone', BlackBone is an amiable and helpful member of the tower, his prowess allowing him to defeat any game with the piece of mind to help out any who ask. He is also not the new king of Ivory Tower despite what he might say.

EpicwarKING EpicwarKING (EWK for short) is an individual that will pop in out of freaking nowhere and will not shut up! (Haha, I'm kidding dude!) But he's actually pretty cool and has multiple babes =] (in his mind)

going2killu A nice kid. Constantly begs big name regulars other than himself to write a Wiki entry for him, but no one ever does. Definitely worth meeting... He's on often but he doesn't talk much.

McKillyoFace Insane to the point of him thinking he's the Black Mage. Commonly insults trolls and anyone not showing an average amount of intelligence, going on and on about it. Generally amiable.

Meatshield He's married... and... he gets action 24/7. Totally random and funny =] EXPECT CAPS LOCK!

NinjaDuckie Resident homosexual and not afraid to defend his honour (note the British 'u' in honour). Gets regularly mistaken for a girl by n00bish troll-types, a couple of whom got to the point of asking him out before realising. He's a boxfag now.

Mostly Inactive
Angelic_Guide Always up for reasoned discussion. Don't understand why people trashed his description here, he's a cool dude.

ClydeVaulter Going by CV or Clyde, this guy often remains idle in the chat, but pops in now and then to voice his opinion, or just to laugh. Generally accepting of most people, save for trolls, spammers, and the such. Also talks Engrish with Soul a lot.

MatchesOnFire Matches is not the kind that simply insults someone, first he gets facts, decides if they are trollish in his mind, then basically tells them to fuck off if they are! He's a troll stomper in his own, and someone I personally love talking to! He's a damn cool guy and I'm glad we became friends after we first met (we had an argument and yeah)...

Sapphiremind A new addition to the tower, Sapphiremind can be identified with sarcasm and immaculate spelling. Refers to herself as "Room Mom" since she's older and has kids of her own.

Slydragon A cool guy who has been in ivory since October of 2008, Sly isn't in Ivory much but if he does happen to be there and talking you should definitely meet him.

Trixitie A favorite of the Ivory Tower, this legendary high-scoring gamer chick usually likes to stop by after hours for chats with Jake, Thor, Kool, and other long-time regulars. And to paraphrase Opiatejake, She's probably hot, because she says she doesn't think she is.

Unclassified
Dyrak Cool kid, the name 'Dyrak' reminds me of dragon. xD fuck naw

Omgitzsky I rock the socks in the fox on the docks :P

User Comments
Suchihaz says: 'Ivory Tower is the BEST chat room on Kongregate... Well actually, its the best chat room I've ever been in anywhere on the net!' No fags allowed to quote.

Opiatejake says: 'Ivory Tower rules for one reason. That one reason is: we respect the n00b. If you are talking to any of us regs we'll help you out and talk to you, unless you are a total retard, period.' Haha, Jake, you make me laugh XD

Omgitzsky says: 'Hi...'

♠TheUzi♠ says: What the hell?! I'm still not on the wiki?!

Mf0ty says: 'I see stupid people' Haha... You MF!

Meatshield says: 'lol my qoutes refer to whores and sexual acts so you might just want to leave me out of that'

holydemon32 says: "I look away from the screen for 2 seconds.. And I see Waldo porn.."

MatchesOnFire says: " What the hell do you mean there are no more cheezy poofs?! That's ridiculous! Oh, and yeah, Ivory Tower rocks your balls, now excuse me while i go find more cheezy poofs.."

ajfriss says: Its boring around here lately. There are the new people, sometimes good ones. And then there are the idiots... Like Jake... Oh shit its already recording? Oh fuck.

Dyrak says: er...um, best room on Kong. No fags allowed to quote.

User Comments on Other Users
SuchihaZ says about Matches: "Matches and Myself started off with a religion related fight, and I'm glad it turned around the very next day! A troll came in and started bothering some regs, myself, and matches. Eventually everyone went troll stomp mode and we got him to stfu. Thats when me and Matches set aside our differences and became friends. Now we talk about this years best movie, Transformers 2!!! lol! Thanks for bein there all this time, Matches!"

Omgitzsky says about Omgitzsky: "Sky is prolly the ruler of Ivory Tower. Not really but shes cool. She likes donuts, too."

XSoulHeadshotX says about Morgan133: "He's almost always on, he's funny and active. He's definetly someone to meet."

Why join Ivory Tower?
The regulars and the non-regulars (aside from the occasional trolls) are very nice. We make lots of jokes; entertainment is a goal in the Ivory Tower! We make sure to get rid of trolls before muting them, so this way they don't harass more people. Besides, the atmosphere, the moderators, and the regulars are just plain EPIC! xD

Instead of asking yourself, why should you join the Ivory Tower, ask why you should not... For this is the true question, a question that need not an answer, but simply to be left alone as only a question. No rebuttal or rebuke required, just a solemn agreement to willingly plunge into the unknown until you find yourself in front of the massive tower built of ivory...

The Ballad of Ivory Tower
(Rogerette is depressed she does not feature in the song. -1 Happy. Same goes for Marb. -2 Happy. Also, there may be lines wrong. It got trolled and was X rated.)

There's a place deep down in the chat room dungeon where very few dare to go,

It's a wild place, and a dangerous place, and a place that's very low.

It's a um, something in there, and a crazy old place, but a hell of a ride so go,

The RAWR Tower is the place to be if you want to a troll.

Because they're big and dumb,

And always easy if you're interested in some.

Just try to act dumb and the regs will put you in your place,

And if you keep on trying it'll just end badly, Jake will bash in your face.

But the rest of us are always around and always ready to lend a hand,

Some line that rhymes with hand

There's AJ whose mind is a little on the wacky,

But it doesn't really matter unless you're acting tacky.

And Epic comes in with a really big mouth,

He may be kind of inbred (we think he's from the south).

Someone's going to get you because he's out for blood,

So all you noobs go back into the mud.

Then there's someone else who'll tell you that you suck,

Stay around too long and he'll really mess you up.

Mint's just as sharp as her name may suggest,

Try to mess with her; she'll prove she's like, good at stuff?

MF might just be the most twisted of the bunch,

Don't talk to him while you're eating your lunch.

And if music is the best, if lyrics are your game,

Just talk to someone, but he will still bring the pain.

And if you want to leave feeling just an inch high,

Just troll with Trek and she'll comply.

When it's time for troll hunting season,

G2K will fuck you up, just give him a reason.

So, like I said before, there's a place deep down in chat room hell,

When I tell you the name it's going to ring a bell.

It's a place of legend and a place of myth, and the darkest dreams of night,

So if you have a problem take it somewhere else because we're ready for a fight.

And it's a fight you'll lose because we have the best damn crew the chat world has ever seen,

Because we're rough and tough and we're smart and cool and damn are we ever mean.

So you may think you're smart and may be ten years old with mad trolling power,

But don't fuck with us my little friend, we'll bury you beneath Ivory Tower.

~Intreker05

Bold text = OMG what are the lyrics