Ivory Tower

Welcome to the Ivory Tower, home of crude humor, zany conversations, and odd characters! You'll never have to fear a troll attack here, for they are all brutally murdered by an IT regular and then burned! Watch out, here comes Jake with his drunken fisticuffs, while mint bites the head off kool and shoves it up his ass! See the excitement here? Once you come to the IT once, you'll never want to leave! So come on in and enjoy yourself as the members dismember this tower brick by brick!

-By MatchesOnFire

Owner and Rules
The current owner of Ivory Tower is Rogerette, who has owned the room since January of 2009.

Rogerette says: "There are three rules of Ivory Tower.
 * 1) If your a reg don't be a dickhead.
 * 2) We are  a dating service. lets talk about sex.
 * 3)  Regs are slightly racist.
 * 4) Dont piss off ivory towers balconys
 * 5)  Ivory tower home of The godly

If you need rule 1. explained, chances are you won't like it here, but feel free to ask.

Moderators
Rogerette Rogerette is the main and most active moderator, and also the room Owner. She doesn't talk constantly, but she is on and watching when she can, and the Ivory Tower loves her. =]

Crysanna She is a Runescape addict and moderates the game chat on there. She is more active on Runescape than in the Ivory Tower.

Regulars
Activity status:

% = Very active

# = Midly active

&amp; = Midly inactive

@ = Incredibly inactive

^ = Hasn't been seen in months

Rogerette The Owner and Queen of the Ivory Tower (Not married to Jake XD)

ajfriss A frequenter of the chat, ajfriss enjoys crushing Troll's ego's, And is the room's resident Insane person. Often late at night starts talking very sophisticated.

Angelic_GuideAlways up for reasoned discussion. Don't understand why people trashed his description here, he's a cool dude. @

Blackbone Always BB, never 'Bone', Blackbone is an amiable and helpful member of the tower, his prowess allowing him to defeat any game with the piece of mind to help out any who ask. He is also not the new king of Ivory Tower despite what he might say.

EpicwarKING EpicwarKING (EWK for short) is an individual that will pop in out of freaking nowhere and will not shut up! (Haha, I'm kidding dude!) But he's actually pretty cool =] &amp;

going2killu A nice kid. Constantly begs big name regulars other than himself to write a wiki entry for him, but no one ever does. Definitely worth meeting.... &amp;

He11 Softly spoken at times, He11 hangs on to the tower from olden times and a great source of a real conversation. @

intreker05 This police recruit will beat you both ways to Sunday before you get an insult in edgeways, but Intreker's really quite tame if you can string two brain cells together in your conversation...(she also likes beer and watches sports :O) &amp;

Kool16 Kool is the koolest, sticks up for the underdog, yet takes no crap from anyone! Beware of his WIT! =] Is also the current king of Ivory Tower. #

Leftymvp Lefty is a pretty cool guy. He's fairly new to ivory but he's still really nice and he's on chat a lot. &amp;

Marbaba Alien from planet Babamarka system. On kongregate alot. Totally awesome. A very pleasant, pacifist, enviromentalist girl who is either on to update us on "Marb News, Starring: Marbaba" or to chat about the latest in gaming. When shes in a bad mood shes calm. That can be an advantage... Or it can bring boredum to the tower. Warning: She bites, pounces and tackles. She also goes all Tae Kwon Do and smartass on some people. Don't get on her bad side, she might just write you an angry hate letter. Often mistaken for a guy. &amp;

MatchesOnFire Matches is not the kind that simply insults someone, first he gets facts, decides if they are trollish in his mind, then basically tells them to fuck off if they are! He's a troll stomper in his own, and someone I personally love talking to! He's a damn cool guy and I'm glad we became friends after we first met (we had an arguement and yeah). . &amp;

McKillyoface Insane to the point of him thinking he's the Black Mage. Commnoly insults trolls and anyone not showing an average amount of intelligence, going on and on about it. Generally amiable. &amp; on weekdays, # on weekends.

Meatshield He's married.... And... He gets action 24/7. Totally random and funny =] #

Mf0ty The badass muther bleeper of the room. Just check the name! MF!! XD

Mint_ She is a regular with somewhat of a temper, but controls it well. She started on a less gender neutral account (No name mentioned) and changed it to a more gender neutral name so there wouldn't be 12 year old stalkers all the time XD. *facedesk*! %

Morgan133 A terrific speller, and a harnesser of the power of sensibility, Morgan is a whiz with timezones and will take the Troll Slam-Dunk (especially when set up by Thor.) %

not_paul Not just a confusing name, but a source of droll quotations from aloof British sitcoms that no one (including Brits) have ever heard of. Also, what the hell does 'droll' mean? That bastard must have written his own wiki entry. Disappeared for awhile and plans on disappearing again in the future for extended periods of time. #

Omgitzsky The usually bored, but awesome, is always the friend/enemy. She can be nice and she can be evil. If you get the "*bites* :3" or "&gt;:(=) RAWR" it is completely normal. She is the main character in the Sky Soap Opera. &amp;

Opiatejake Used to be the king of the Ivory Tower. He doesn't take crap from no one, but is still funny and cool. He makes jokes often when he isn't idle. He's marb's "bri bro." @ in the evening and # in the morning

Sapphiremind A new addition to the tower, Sapphiremind can be identified with sarcasm and immaculate spelling. &amp;

Slydragon A cool guy who has been in ivory since October of 2008, Sly isn't in ivory much but if he does happen to be there and talking you should definetly meet him.

Suchihaz Also the one who began this page (before it was just blank :s), SuchihaZ has only been in the Ivory Tower for around a month, but quite frequently. Tries to be as active, funny, and nice as possible (but fails), and still lets his oppinion be known in arguements! XD (However bad they may be) Suchihaz is about as active as a retarded 1 legged sloth. Also gets angry really quickly. ^

The Ripper The famously renowned "Jack the Ripper", murderer of 5 prostitutes, risen from his grave. Very violent. Likes cutting things open, to see what is inside them, including, but not limited to, human corpses.

Thor0486 Pals with Jake and a real troll stomper, Thor's razor wit and sarcastic remarks cause trolls to fear him and certain lazy moderators to love him. Arrives to commiserate with the summons "So, Metallica's sold out..." Also enjoys Cake. And can and usually is a big dick. I'm not joking, he really is annoying, but when it comes to political debates and owning trolls there's no better. #

Trixitie A favorite of the Ivory Tower, this legendary high-scoring gamer chick usually likes to stop by after hours for chats with Jake, Thor, Kool, and other long-time regulars. And to paraphrase Opiatejake, "She's probably hot, because she says she doesn't think she is." @

Uratashi Loves to just play games and watch the chat, but if it is interesting enough, he will join in. #

XSoulHeadshotX The Welshy of the room, she has a profound knowledge of space and most things that connect to that, she also never gets badges and when she does its a real landmark. Other than that she can tell you some great RPG games if your ever on the lookout and don't even get started with her on FF, you can't catch her on anything with that. For some reason her favorite football club is Liverpool despite being Welsh. She is also the second oldest regular rivaled only by jake. (her first account being perma-banned.) %

Ivory Tower Atmosphere
Well, for one, the atmosphere is quite laid back, aside conversations and such. Only a troll or two a day, which are muted by the regulars, because they have brains. As for new members, F off! if your new forget about it! &lt;- The last sentence was written by a dumb arse don't listen to it. *cough*kool16*cough*

People to watch out for
Queeraphot: Beware he will try to convince you he's actually called weeraphot. He loves to insult using the word douche bag or d-bag. If you try to flame him back he will call you a 'hater'. Most likely he is a loser who thinks insulting people is how to fit in.

Student: Has long been banned but if he ever returns beware. He loves to talk about poop and is likely a 9 year old with no friends.

Alessa: Unlike student who is likely a 9 year old with no friends. She IS a 9 year old with no friends.

McConnell: An illiterate retard who insults people LyK DiS. Is likely an elementary school dropout.

Manifested: A dumbass who insults regulars and LUUURRRRVVVVSSS runescape. Instead of saying muted he says blocked &amp; reported, or more accuretly "blcked nd rported" Manifested is likely a 40 year old hoping he might one day do something worthwhile. Also enjoys talking like he knows what the hell he's doing. "Iam notcing u r rly like 2 curse nd yell, plz stp blcked nd rported"

AJfriss: An angry little six-year-old who lost his dildo and will stop at nothing to get it back. He loves to be teased, Dun tell him but uratshi is his bitch!

hahaman456:Tell him hes cool cuz its true yayayayay.

erno_rainbow: The best spammer in the world, people seem to hate him for some reason so I guess I have to put him up. No point in making fun of him because he fucking owns.

Thor4404:is a troll AKA newcomer hater he is an ass and thinks hes cool uratashi told me i should mention this

User Comments
Suchihaz says: 'Ivory Tower is the BEST chat room on Kongregate... Well actually, its the best chat room I've ever been in anywhere on the net!'

Kool16 says: 'Warning: Adult Content' But I'm sure he's kidding =] Or not... Who knows?

Opiatejake says: 'Ivory tower rules for one reason. That one reason is: we respect the n00b. If you are talking to any of us regs we'll help you out and talk to you, unless you are a total retard, period.' Haha, Jake, you make me laugh XD

Mint says: 'Why i like it?... probably because there's more talking girls here than talking boys... maybe not more... atleast a comparable number though'

Mf0ty says: 'I see stupid people' Haha... You MF!

Meatshield says: 'lol my qoutes refer to whores and sexual acts so you might just want to leave me out of that'

holydemon32 says: "I look away from the screen for 2 seconds.. And I see Waldo porn.."

MatchesOnFire says: " What the hell do you mean there are no more cheezy poofs?! That's ridiculous! Oh, and yeah, Ivory Tower rocks your balls, now excuse me while i go find more cheezy poofs.."

XSoulHeadshotX says: "i like penis do you."

User Comments on Other Users
MatchesOnFire says about Kool16: "He's only the coolest cracka the internet has ever seen! We're lucky to have him a part of the Tower Team. What I like most about him is his respect for the n00b. Once, long ago, I was a n00b. Kool found me, dusted me off, and placed me high upon the mantle of Regulars of the Ivory Tower. Kudos dude!

SuchihaZ says about Kool16: "If it weren't for kool, I probably wouldn't be a reg right now. In fact, I would probably have left before I met matches if it weren't for him. Kool has high respect for n00bs as long as they don't troll Ivory Tower. Thanks Kool, you fucking own!"

SuchihaZ says about Matches: "Matches and Myself started off with a religion related fight, and I'm glad it turned around the very next day! A troll came in and started bothering some regs, myself, and matches. Eventually everyone went troll stomp mode and we got him to stfu. Thats when me and Matches set aside our differences and became friends. Now we talk about this years best movie, Transformers 2!!! lol! Thanks for bein there all this time, Matches!"

Kool16 says: What can I say, I bring harmony. Besides if it wasnt for you guys and the rest of ya'll, the tower would just be another lame ass room. You regs make it EPIC! And if the haters wanna hate, then its their loss.

XSoulHeadshotX says about Morgan133: "He's almost always on, he's funny and active. He's definetly someone to meet."

Why join Ivory Tower
The regulars and the non regulars (aside from the occasional trolls) are very nice. We make lots of jokes; entertainment is a goal in the Ivory tower! We make sure to get rid of trolls before muting them, so this way they don't harass more people. Besides, the atmosphere, the moderators, and the regulars are just plain EPIC! xD

Instead of asking yourself, why should you join the Ivory Tower, ask why you should not... For this is the true question, a question that need not an answer, but simply to be left alone as only a question. No rebuttal or rebuke required, just a solemn agreement to willingly plunge into the unknown until you find yourself in front of the massive Tower built of Ivory..

The Ballad of Ivory Tower
There’s a place deep down in the chat room dungeon where very few dare to go

It’s a wild place, and a dangerous place, and a place that’s very low.

But it’s the best damn place in the whole damn place and that’s all you need to know

It’s a jungle in there, and a crazy old place, but a hell of a ride so go

The Ivory Tower is the place to be if you want to hunt down some trolls

Because they’re big and dumb and always easy if you’re interested in some lolz

Just try to be stupid and try to act dumb and the regs will put you in your place

And if you keep on trying it’ll just end badly, Jake will sit on your face.

Rogerette and Crysanna are the room’s two mods, ready to silence and ban

But the rest of us are always around and always ready to lend a hand

There’s AJ whose mind is a little on the wacky

But it doesn’t really matter unless you’re acting tacky

And Epic comes in with a really big mouth

He may be kind of inbred (we think he’s from the south)

Suchi’s going to get you because he’s out for blood

So all you little trolls go back into the mud.

Then there’s Matches who’ll tell you that you suck

Stay around too long and he’ll really mess you up

Mint’s just as sharp as her name may suggest

Try to mess with her; she’ll prove she’s best

MF might just be the most twisted of the bunch

Don’t talk to him while you’re eating your lunch.

And if music is the best, if lyrics are your game

Just talk to Thor, but he will still bring the pain.

And if you want to leave feeling just an inch high

Just troll with Trek and she’ll comply

Then there’s the guy whose name says he’s no tool

Try to screw with him, he’s the guy called Kool

And when it’s time for troll hunting season,

G2K will fuck you up, just give him a reason

So, like I said before, there’s a place deep down in chat room hell

When I tell you the name it’s going to ring a bell

It’s a place of legend and a place of myth, and the darkest dreams of night

So if you have a problem take it somewhere else because we’re ready for a fight

And it’s a fight you’ll lose because we have the best damn crew the chat world has ever seen

Because we’re rough and tough and we’re smart and cool and damn are we ever mean.

So you may think you’re smart and may be ten years old with mad trolling power.

But don’t fuck with us my little friend, we’ll burry you beneath Ivory Tower.

~Intreker05

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