Duck Avvy From Mike

Feed The Ducks, owned by Yelhsa, is very well known for being the best room on Kongregate (yes, contrary to The Lair, who "claims" said title). No one knows exactly what is found in Feed the Ducks, although there is a pond, a lot of food and a lot of ducks. Yes, ducks. But these ducks bite and snap, so please remember to bring food to feed the ducks. In thebarge's absence, moderators overrun the place and party!

On October 21, 2016, Mostly Harmless and Counterproductive Procrastinators merged into Feed the Ducks.


Before you continue reading, please take a look at our sign below.

Yes, we love to warn people first. Now, continue!

How you should behaveEdit

Read the Behavior Guidelines so you know how to behave in Kongregate Chat rooms.

About the room owner, thebargeEdit

thebarge is a well-known and well-respected moderator of Kongregate.  He secretly is in love with AStrawberrySlush!  Along with ApprenticeChief, they work their hardest to ensure that trolls (like those reading this page) do not wreak havoc on Kongregate.

Despite his heavy work schedule, he still finds time to Feed the Ducks. (Unlike all you selfish stingy people out there who won't share your food! We get hungry too!)

Feed the Ducks, en blog!Edit

Feed the Ducks has its own blog! Can you believe that?!


Feed the Ducks' regulars are playing many games. Here are some examples.




A lot of members in Feed the Ducks play Ikariam. We used to have an alliance, led by MyDreamName. It is now inactive, although. A Kongregate Alliance (Not led by FtD) still exists on Iota, and some members of Feed the Ducks still enjoy to play Ikariam.

On a side note, the idea of Ikariam being a Kong thing has been around for a large while. The whole idea started over an year ago in early 2008 before Feed the Ducks was made.


  • RPGLord approves this message. (P.S, you guys don't know me. :P)
  • MyDreamName approves this message.
  • Aldir approves this potato.
  • Some random troll put his name near the top of the list. Problem? (also, he approves this message.)
  • midget079 approves this message.
  • Blood_BathxX approves this message.
  • TheDarkFlame approves this message.
  • EndlessSporadic approves this message.
  • joshhh approves this message.
  • Kuhfelsen approves this message.
  • John McCain says this message is a myth.
  • PopUpPirate approves this message.
  • Naomi2976 decides this messages is not lies
  • Oathness doesn't like Ikariam.
  • Crush748 Believes there are no lavazards.
  • sellyme approves this message.
  • MaistlinRajere does not approve this message.
  • Samanoske may or may not approve this message.
  • SlasherX Hates MyDreamName but loves Ikariam
  • Kaluzaklein approves this message
  • Hetiekae believes you should skip the next line.
  • HappyAlcoholic just made you lose The Game.
  • GHXpert59 is angry at HappyAlcoholic for making him lose The Game.
  • Oh, and GHXpert59 approves this message.
  • Diablokoaiua Loves HappyAlcoholic. :D
  • Sasms thinks editing wikis makes him cool.
  • ConverseKid just randomly clicked on the Edit button
  • <_< >_>
  • someone93 fed this message to his fellow ducks.
  • PHatHome666 approves something he hasn't read because he was promised pie.
  • ClaireSable approves of this Patrick.
  • SEANOm.d. just poked himself in the eye.
  • Looper something something this message
  • Badgy_McBadger pulled a Looper.
  • Bobguy13 paused his music for this
  • sodarox likes to speak of herself in the 3rd person
  • JohnLeprechaun feels overwhelmed.
  • Shatructoell feels disturbed.
  • Bill likes Ducks.
  • In the absence of other penguins, ItBePenguinYo approves of this message for all penguins.
  • Jacob713 approves this message. (whatever message it is)
  • Will6316 approves this message as a representative of all people who have usernames that sound like a seven year old thought of them.

Kingdom of LoathingEdit

An adventurer is you! Many Kongregaters (And ducks) also play Kingdom of Loathing, or KoL for short. Come join us! Register here! We would suggest you to choose your starter class as Pastamancer, as he/she also has some healing skills, and is okay/good in battle. Don't worry, if you complete the game and "ascend", you are allowed to change your class, and try different ways to complete the game. Pastamancers can also summon "noodles", which sell for a good price in the game. Oh, and the KoL currency is meat. Yes, cash is useless, they use meat for everything.

Need help?Edit

Stuck? Don't know how to play the game? Need help in a quest? Just ask any of the adventurers listed below, they might be able to help you. You can also check out the KoL Wiki for some help. It has all the information you need, such as Item Statics, Quest Guides, and so on. It also has many Greasemonkey Scripts, which can help you a lot in the game, adding spoilers for an example.


Notice that Hyp3rion should not be messed up with Hyp3ri0n (#1720976) in the game. Though Hyp3ri0n played KoL before, and started now over, this can be his alt on KoL. Confirmed by Juze: Hyp3ri0n doesn't want to make his mind go back one year in time, when the Hyp3ri0n existed on KoL. So he just started over right now.

Billy Versus SNAKEMANEdit

Billy Versus SNAKEMAN (Or BvS for short) is an anime parody game about Naruto, Bleach, Death Note, Code Geass, and more, revolving around ninjas, where you do missions for money and items, help out your village and play games for prizes, like the Prize Wheel, sorta like the Wheel of Fortune, where you can win rare items exclusive to certain days. To do mostly anything, you have a daily Stamina amount, which can be raised with certain items, and you regain it at 'Dayroll'.


I'm sure everyone knows what minecraft is. The FTD server is hosted by our very wonderful Southpaw018

the server thinngo is and there is a a short process you'd have to go though but you can log on without it, you just wont have permissions. Talk to Aiglet1 or South and they'll sort you out


Whatpulse is a 'game' where you install a program (virus free, as checked with S&D and AVG 8.0 + F-Secure) which counts how many time you press a button on your keyboard, a button on your mouse or even how far you move your mouse. Kongregate has a team Kongregate with the password 'greg' (without the apostrophes)

"Players" Edit

A full list of players can be seen on the team page, with statistics:

Click it!

We currently have 300 (and counting) "players". (Nabb isn't winning anymore! \o/)

Thread Edit

Kongregate Team @ WhatPulse is the official team thread. It is being run by sellyme and any bugs/questions should be directed to him, although most forum regulars will be happy to help you.

Unofficial website Edit

Kongpulse is the teams unofficial website, run by sellyme. It is also contributed to by Momma-K70 (WP screenname: Momma-Kong), JaumeBG and notverygood.

It has team stats, user stats, featured users, country stats, PvP battles, and even cookies given out for doing well. The cookies are exchangeable for prizes. It is updated every weekday, and sometimes bonus updates come out on the weekend.

Come Join UsEdit

Now you know a little about Feed the Ducks you should come join us. By clicking the following link: Link you will jump straight to us, on an idle program made by our very own Yeknomssa.

Moderators in Feed the DucksEdit

Regular moderatorsEdit


One of, if not the, Kongregate's best moderator. No introduction required. 'Nuff said.


The most epic mod in the world, one that everyone loves. It is Feed the Ducks honor to have him as a mod. Always afk.


This moderator is amazing. He has enough power and influence to burn your eyelashes off. Srsly, don't mess with him. That's why he deserves his own spot as a moderator. He's too epic.

This person has no known records on the Internet. First rule of Nabbland, you do not talk about Nabbland. Second rule about Nabb, you do not talk to Nabb. Thirdly, he has enough coding experience to crash your browser. Yes, even those lousy, third party browsers.

Stay far away. Far far away. Police are still researching new ways to approach him without being vaporized.

Doesn't actually mod. Pretends to be afk whenever someone modcalls in FtD.

JudeMaverick and Nabb are actually the same person. Or that's the rumour.


He is an awesome mod, fun loving. Awesome. <insert more wonderful stuff>


Who do you call when you need someone to mow the grass? That's right! You call thebarge! He is one of the senior members of the chatroom and gladly assists in stopping idiots.

Word of warning. Get off his lawn. He's still hugging Laxaria's friend, Knifey, the sharp knife. It might still be in his arm, so yea. >.>

Has a super special awesome bot called "Bargebot" which has over 20 commands, and tweets random quotes from chat (under the username Bargebot).

Not so regular moderatorsEdit


His name is hard to spell. Oh, and he automatically teleports to Feed the Ducks sometimes.


"I am that gender confused child that you never wanted."

This moderator is epically AFK all the time yet somehow knows everything that has happened. Don't eat his cookies. They are usually spiked.


1 word. HAWT!

But sadly went to moderate Role Playing 1.


Don't tell anyone I'm in here.

JudeMaverick Edit

"Whoops! Did you mean "Feed the Trolls?"

He's cool enough to not be organized in alphabetical form. But that's why Juze banned her.

JudeMaverick and Nabb are actually the same person. Or that's the rumour.


"*Throws pie at you* In your face! LITERALLY!"

Laxaria is a well respected moderator in Feed the Ducks, watching over the chat room to ensure trolls do not stab, cook, roast, stuff, steam, fry, stir-fry... You get the idea, ducks. Working together with the other well known moderators of Feed the Ducks, he ensures that there are no idiots in chat turning it into a troll fest. And he likes pie. Key Lime Pie. Yummmmm! It is also rather common for him to pinch Sakuya's butt.

Left, but comes back sometimes. When he's bored. He always is bored though, so he's always in FtD now.


He rides a large swan and screams like a banshee.


"Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some abuse the privilege."

I’m always here, there, or everywhere... I might be even behind you... Wait, don't check! I'm shy(when i choose to be so). And I hold a gun. A powerful gun. Fear the gun. Yes my guns are blazing hot. Hot and smoking! Whoo hot!


For someone called unproductive, he is very productive in badges and moderating. Very productive. Oh the irony, and the idiocy of this statement.


We normally call our members "ducks", but that creates problems when people "accidentally" misspell ducks as, well, you know. So let's just call them users shall we?


"lol you all suck"

13elite37 thinks they are the coolest person in FtD, but in reality they aren't. overly cocky at times, 13elite37 is moderately cool at best. likes to pick fights with noobs, and is occasionally caught saying "I like my noobs explosion cooked >:D". is famous for their usage of :D

Aiglet1 Edit

May 24, 1993 - September 5, 2012Edit

Y u do. So sexy.

One of our best community members.. Always so helpful, willing to give advice, and to give a good debate any time.. To many of us, he was one of the most selfless and loving friend who anyone could have asked for. He was (sometimes literally) the lion amongst us. May you Rest in Peace Aiggy.. <3

"... Sleep well, and dream of large women."



AwesomeX2 is a no nonsense person, who aside from being a stunning gentleman, is also a glowing beacon in an unclear world.

Banned ='(


A cat, called Blak. SHE likes to dance. Yes she is female.

Blood BathxXEdit

Blood_BathxX: Blalh, you konw I scuk at typing.

Blood is the King of typographical errors. No matter how simple a word is, he can typo the hell out of it until it is completely unrecognizable. He attempts to correct said typos, and usually makes it worse. At this point, he explodes. Also, he makes people around him typo.


"I pronounce migraines AAAARG- MY- HEAD!"
"How many Kongregators does it take to change a light bulb? All of them, if you make a badge for it."
"Some of my greatest work comes out right before I fall asleep."

Catinthewall is a friendly, duck loving individual who doesn't harm ducks. He is an exceptionally witty person (he, right?) who loves to make jokes and entertain the loud duck laughter in the room. Absolutely hilarious. Absolutely... just... lol...


"PopUpPirate is my lovely wife."

She is my lovely wife indeed. I do not troll despite what you all hear but I have a very odd sense of what you should and should not do in the chatroom.

People who get this guy annoyed are very susceptible to attacks which leave no evidence behind. Ask boopy for details.

Boop says "he crashed my computer :("


Is a winner of the game. Nuff said.


He needs to be more active in order to be in this list.

FailPanda Edit

One of the forgotten regulars from Mostly Harmless. Never made that room's wiki, but sometimes you have to make your own luck.


I realized he wasn't here so I decided to add him. Is known by many as, "Forsetits" :D

GHXpert59 Edit

Some nicknames I have are 59, GHX, and Xpert.

This line contains no information about me.

That's about all I have for my Kong Wiki entry! Bai!

GeluPatchouli (among other names) Edit

Usually around but not always. Easiest to find via messaging if needed.

1. Concentrate your mind. . .

2. Mutter the spell to Mini-Hakkero tenderly. . .

3. Aim at someone you don’t like. . .

4. Now unleash your annihilation of love!!


Happy is a very happy alcoholic (obviously..).He is a very nice and polite guy, who seems to love clowns. And he NEVER takes off his sunglasses. Happy owns millions of alts, literally - Millions! (658) Overall - he is a very nice and 'friendly' guy.


One of the hardcore players. Has an amazing GamerScore of 24,500+ on Xbox Live. He even beats you on Guitar Hero. Oh, and he has beaten Through the Fire and the Flames on Expert without any failures. There's no way you can beat this guy in games. Only MrRubix can. And Tasselfoot. Possibly.


The madcap stereotypical drunk of FtD, Ice can normally be found drunk and muting us all so he can play on his silly little guitar games. When he's not failing on Easy mode he likes to flirt. And he's English.


Joshhh used to be one of the Regular Mods for FtD. He however is no longer a moderator due to his inactivity. His M left to find a new more loving home and Joshhh wishes with all his heart that his old M now has the love it respects.

Josh frequently disappears for weeks / months at a time and then will randomly appear late at night for a good few hours possibly a day or two and then usually just vanishes again.

Juze "*Does a chocolate rain*"

Juze, also sometimes called as Juice, Jooz or Jews, is an active Ducker and Kongregater. Also the overgod of this wiki that can ban anyone reading this (Yes, that means you), especially moderators who don't like to sign in before editing their section on this article. He feeds the ducks with chocolate. He hasn't eaten any sweets since Y2K (Year 2000), though.


Kitten is one of the many furres in our room. She's very kind and welcoming, and loves to pounce her friends, especially New2U2. Those two are very close, and like to role-play. Kitten encourages tolerance of everyone. Don't judge someone until you get to know them. Tolerance, kindness and patience are good qualities to have. New and Kitten try to keep RP within reason. No lasers, autokills, stuff like that. Check out her or New's profiles to find out how they RP. If their RP bothers you, ask nicely, and she'll probably be accommodating. Be rude about it, and she'll most likely ignore you.


Kaluza Because Yes. Also affectionately called 'AsianKevin' by Sinapi and PugusDoggers.

He likes Gir.


"Looper: ^

Looper: ****"

Ex-MalF reg who came to Feed the Ducks for shelter. Has one hell of a jewfro. Usually friendly, but has his bad days. "Doesn't everybody? ~ Looper"


Has an undying love for PinkE (and Toast) -- ...wat? That's news to me ._.


MyDreamName is an old regular from Feed the Ducks, inactive for a while, lurking once in an while, and back to participating in chat.


Midget, as you've probably guessed, thinks he is rather short. We don't care, because he's fun to talk to and very friendly.

MonochromeMolly Edit

ClaireSable: I wear the pants.

MonochromeMolly: I'm not wearing pants.

Yet another user who came to FtD through the DF collapse. Very friendly and always willing to help.


One of the most loved members of FtD, he is one of the original members, joining shortly after it was created. Was there for the great mod uprising, and the golden days of Ducklette's reign. Killed the last boss of the internet in the name of Ducklette and for the honour of FtD. Is active also on the FtD Minecraft server.

What a guy! - Everyone on Navigatorblack

So smart and cute, and also modest - Everyone else on Navigatorblack


This section has been revised by ClaireSable. Take care Nao :D

You got to it before I did, thank you Claire <3 Naomi gets a heart too <3 ~Sinapi

Awww thanks guys :3 *these comments are approved by Naomi*

Fun fact: is australian.


New 2U2 is another one of our many furres. He is a large winged panther who can shift forms. He is always ‘In Character’ to some extent, and is very much a feline in his moods, thinking, reflexes and approach to situations. Kitten's mate, he enjoys good role-play. New and Kitten try to keep RP within reason. No lasers, autokills, stuff like that. If their RP bothers you, ask nicely, and he will probably be accommodating. He also encourages tolerance of everyone, but is not quite as gregarious as Kitten. If you try to cuddle or pet him without his permission, you may lose an arm. New is currently on hiatus from the internet.




Is a beautiful butterfly.


Also known as OBS, AWWBBS, Shoe, and by his close friends and arch enemies "Hoe". Has sporadic visits, but always comes with a bag of bread for the ducks when he does pop in for a visit. His hobbies include photography, gaming, chatting and the guitar.

"My only console was a Playboy Color."


PaisleyStream: "I remember when I had braces. They sucked literal ass."

New2U2: "Literal?"

PaisleyStream: "Oh wait, what?"

PinkFuzzyBunny: (posts a link)

skyboy: Cute

thebarge: lol

PaisleyStream: What's wrong with it?

Paisley is a regular at Feed The Ducks. She loves excessive minimodding, a great topic to chat about, her friends, her pets, her ipod, and ice cream cake. Paisley is having a back operation done on November 4 (it's true, even though she lied about the pictures (lol) because she couldn't scan the actual xray). She's also on a badge frenzy, trying to level up to 50, but has problems because of her instant boredom. Paisley spits out anything that is on her mind, whether it sounds right or not. She's to the point and thorough. She doesn't always mean what she says or know what she says; just as long as it sounds cool.

Paji Edit

He's pretty awesome. Just ask ApprenticeChief.


I can't for the life of me remember why I even thought of putting him here. But it might have to do with the fact that he's awesome =D Likes to float from Feed the Ducks and Ninja Chat. *has ascended to modhood*

He's a mod now, but I'm too lazy to move him - Looper


The Religious One.


He's addicted to Sacred Seasons MMORPG despite getting all the badges.

He is also very weird. HE WAS HARRASSING ME IN PMs AAAAAH.

Seems interested in chastity belts. "PugusDoggers: Wow that looks kind of kinky (reply)" If Pugus never (sexually) harasses you in PM or in main chat, there must be something horribly wrong with you. Very very wrong with you.

^Perverted Nubfaic <3


came into ftd as THEREALMISSINGNO in 2010 with random songs and friending mods now he just chills out and joins random conversations while wandering into other chat rooms from time to time.


Sam the corgi is well known for his fully armed nuclear arsenal ready to incinerate any unsuspecting trolls/spammers/fools/regulars/mods/Ducklettes that cross his path. At certain given times, he will suddenly turn into an intellectual capable of master debating on all topics known to exist. Previously an active member of The Van, he currently enjoys lounging around the pond nomming the grass at will.


"Sasms: I'm out of fuic! Quick sel, buy me another one!"

"sellyme: What address should I send it to?"

"Sasms: email"

The resident FtD artist. Originally spent most of his time in the forums replying to art requests but was dragged into FtD by sellyme. Completely sucks at games and admits it.


Seano is a Hipster.


"Sellyme: No, Australia doesn't have roads. And our Government gives out complimentary Kangaroos to every man, woman and child in the country."

For some reason his profile thingo disappeared. He blames Jabor. Is very sarcastic, doesn't like trolls or idiots, and everyone he has ever muted has been perma-banned (31/31). He runs quite a few things for Kongregate's Whatpulse team, and is well respected in those circles. He doesn't spend as much time in FtD as he used to, though.


Probably the most epic user in FtD. I hate him though, he won't add me. Oh and he can hack chat. So yeah, don't mess with him. Word is that he is just a bunch of code, trapped inside a computer, which explains why none of us have seen pictures of him.


SirenSong is awesome. Fact.

SlasherX Edit

Likes Men.


Uselessness personified. Often goes AWOL, at which time he can be found in either The Van or Ninja Chat.

Pointlessly sarcastic. Pointlessly.


TheLurkerMan started visiting Feed the Ducks in August 2011 and has since become a regular. He pops into FtD almost every day.


He's tall. Very very tall. I think.


"You cant sex the ducks, only feed them."
"Im Tioga, and I approve this message."

More amazing than sliced bread.


Added against his wishes. Im a mean mean person.
"No u!"

xRawr Edit

Sellyme: I'M ALIVE!!

xRawr: Dammit...

xRawr: I mean, sup.

A very old reg who has been in FtD from 2008, and is HappyAlcoholic's sister. She can be intimidating and creepy at times, but if she likes you, there is no worry of your head being bitten off. She isn't afraid to say what she thinks and is a pure Australian badass.

Extra note: She's also very pretty. c:


Evil person, silenced frequently but cool in his own little way

Not so regular membersEdit

Derivative (SteveySA)Edit

A newbie at the Wiki, but a pro on Kong. He's been playing games here since the beginning, and has had various accounts since 2008. He barely has a life. (Hangs out with friends.) He views the world as mathematical and scientific computations (NERD!). He spends 40% of his time in Feed the Ducks, 10% in Digg Mark 1, 10% in The Underground (World 1-2), and the rest in the... Forums! He's nacho average regular. (Oh, and he's a cyborg. Don't forget that.)


the deadliest pistoleer in the west, known well, but not widely, for deadpan snarking and general ConverseKiditude.

Wears a nice suit.


One of the hardcore players. Has a fairly impressive GamerScore of 24,500+ on Xbox Live. He even beats you on Guitar Hero. Oh, and he has beaten Through the Fire and the Flames on Expert without any failures. There's no way you can beat this guy in games. Only MrRubix can. And Tasselfoot. Possibly.


The madcap stereotypical drunk of FtD, Ice can normally be found drunk and muting us all so he can play on his silly little guitar games. When he's not failing on Easy mode he likes to flirt. And he's English.

ItBePenguinYo Edit

He is a penguin and he is back. That is all you need to know.


~The AFKing, at least 11 hours a day ;D~

Often mistaken for the mathematical Pi when someone abbreviates "platinumice" to "PI".


I'm in FtD literally every second I spend on Kong (Which is up to 20 hours a day on average). I don't speak much in main chat, as I tend to get carried away when I do and post walls of text. I try to be nice and helpful to everyone, though, so don't be afraid to ask me for help with whatever. I also <3 pink fluffy things.


He's a pretty top bloke, eh?

Basically, everyone knows he's one of the coolest guys on Kongregate, thanks partly due to his rugged good looks, but mostly due to his status as a massive oldfag on Kongregate.



Lover of all things music and always taking up valuable space that could be used by other loving FTD frequenters.


A guy who's username sucks, as it was generated from random username thing from a website he was on when he was 5yrs old. Cousin of SlasherX


Not in FTD nearly as much as before, but pops in every now and then and to say hi and give a political opinion or two. Is accused of stealing a duck instead of Feeding it. Tends to pop in General from time to time.


Made Feed the Ducks Idle, he is incredible for this. Though he was incredible anyway.

Chat logsEdit

Some crazy things may happen sometime on Feed the Ducks, and we will collect them over here.

Gemcraft Chapter 0Edit

Thorstein: alright mods, Gemcraft: Chapter 0 wont load, FIX THIS

Juze: Why mods?

Juze: It's your problem.

Juze: Only you can fix it.

HappyAlcoholic: lolgrammarfail

PHatHome666: Go eat a RAM sammich. You know you want a byte.

dialMforMONKEY: But it could also be a problem with the game itself.

Thorstein: Juze, if you knew anything you would know that a mod is something that runs the games on this site, retard.

HappyAlcoholic: *lols*

dialMforMONKEY: Lol, phat.

Juze: Lol fail.

Juze: Mods don't run games on Kongregate.

Thorstein: yes they do Jews. (Editor notice: :O One of the guys who call me Jews again! --Juze 11:54, September 28, 2009 (UTC))

Juze: ^ Fail.

PHatHome666: Thors, stop that.

Juze: Admins run.

Thorstein: Yeah we all know what i said.

Juze: Jim and Emily.

Thorstein: Admins run the site moron.. you know what forget it i don't want to even talk to people with your intelligence capacity, muted.

PHatHome666: Thors, mods deal with chat.

dialMforMONKEY: Thors.

Thorstein: Can anyone here ACTUALLY help me or are you guys just going to try to troll?

dialMforMONKEY: YOu're an idiot.

PHatHome666: And you can stop the trolling

HappyAlcoholic: "Intelligence capacity"

dialMforMONKEY: We can't do shit aobut your problem.

dialMforMONKEY: *about

dialMforMONKEY: I can't type today.

HappyAlcoholic: Are you sure you didn't mean "intellectual capacity"?

dialMforMONKEY: Too big a word, happ.

theprophetON: lolpwnt

Juze: ^ Lol what a fail dude (Thor)

Juze: Doesn't know what a mod is and an admin

PHatHome666: Major *headdesk* (reply) (Editor's notice: Private message from Phat to Juze)

To PHatHome666: Same here.

Thorstein: Actually i meant what i said... Intelligence capacity, intellectual capacity is different.

Maek me a modEdit

Well this one was definitely a joke, but it's funny.

HappyAlcoholic: tehghostgamer u mod

HappyAlcoholic: how to become a mod

TheGhostGamer: sleep with greg

HappyAlcoholic: mak me a mod theghostgamr

PHatHome666: Or payfor his WoW

HappyAlcoholic: im nice i can b a mod

TheGhostGamer: u gota sleep with greg k

TheGhostGamer: i cnt maek u mo

TheGhostGamer: d

dialMforMONKEY: You're typing just went to shit.

dialMforMONKEY: What the hell?

HappyAlcoholic: MAk ME A MOD

TheGhostGamer: It's a joke.

Juze: Yeah, it's a joke.

PHatHome666: *mods HA*

TheGhostGamer: Lol.

HappyAlcoholic: Wait, what?


dialMforMONKEY: I did pass the test.

dialMforMONKEY: 20/20.

PHatHome666: The 20 question mod test?

PHatHome666: As did I, M

TheGhostGamer: I got a 6.

dialMforMONKEY: But I"m no mod yet.

HappyAlcoholic: There is no "mod test". Lol.

PugusDoggers: lawl

TheGhostGamer: I think I did pretty good.

... And so on. The End.

Forseti teaches English to a RussianEdit

muthafaker2: Это shit
TheDarkFlame: Is there a Russian room?
awalters: yes
Forseti: На английском, да = yes. нет = no. OK?
TheDarkFlame: Was that for our benefit as well Fors?
muthafaker2: Это хрень shit.
Forseti: i guess
Tioga: Go eat
Tioga: lul
Forseti: muthafaker2
muthafaker2: Это не русский комнату, мы говорим только на английском здесь. Извините
Tioga: *is fluent in Russian*
todbot1: Are you trying to teach him English? o_o
Oathness: lol.
muthafaker2: Forseti:Это не русский комнату, мы говорим только на английском здесь. Извините
Forseti: успокоиться
awalters: if so that is epic and spammy at the same time, but sooo epic that I really don't care since we kind of have a dead chat o-o
Forseti: no
TheDarkFlame: That's the message I sent him earlier... *sigh*
Forseti: only that was teaching English lol
awalters: ah
muthafaker2: yes no
Tioga: OH MY GOD
Forseti: muthafaker2
Forseti: вы хотите найти русский чате?
Forseti: lol he said yes no
muthafaker2: no.
Forseti: OK
Tioga: oh em gee
Forseti: i win!!
muthafaker2: в чате в английском комнате является смешной
Oathness: TWO English words*
awalters: chat room in English is a funny?
Forseti: He says English chatrooms are funny.
Forseti: lol
awalters: Russian ones are to us ;)
Forseti: i'll translate that awal
awalters: D:
awalters: ok
muthafaker2: yes no yes no!
Tioga: Этот чат - для английского разговора
Forseti: Русский из них к нам
Forseti: lol ham
muthafaker2: ha
Forseti: i want to teach him English now
muthafaker2: m
muthafaker2: ham?
Forseti: ham
muthafaker2: ham?
todbot1: *laughing*
Tioga: ham
Forseti: еда
Forseti: ham еда.
awalters: ham =
ninjawarrior95: wat dos da blood on my icon mean???
Forseti: ham Английский продовольствие
muthafaker2: что означает ветчина?
Tioga: mutha, Вы говорите на английском языке? ответ с да или нет.
muthafaker2: eat ham?
Forseti: he doesn't
Forseti: Yes
Tioga: EAT HAM
Forseti: Yes muthafaker2
awalters: he knows a few sub words based on things we have said
Forseti: i taught him yes and no
Forseti: so booya i win
awalters: but fluency is unlikely
Forseti: of course
muthafaker2: tioga no
Forseti: he says "Yes no yes no"
Tioga: WHAt
Tioga: NOW
Forseti: hey i taught him no
Forseti: suck my dick boy
awalters: :O
Tioga: Yes
Tioga: But
TheDarkFlame: Awal, it would be brilliant if he just came out with "How dare you say such a thing, good sir?" or something.
awalters: XD
awalters: indeed
Forseti: TDF
Forseti: I want to teach him that now
Forseti: I SHALL
muthafaker2: yes no yes no !
todbot1: K, I'll be back in an hour when my gold is supposedly going to be given.
TheDarkFlame: You could just send him to a Russian room.
Forseti: muthafaker2
Forseti: TDF
muthafaker2: yes?
Forseti: he said he likes it here just so you know
muthafaker2: no?
Forseti: muthafaker2
TheDarkFlame: Although this could be a very... interesting... conversation.
Forseti: Как ты смеешь так говорить, батюшка
Tioga: mutha, в чате говорят "hello". на английском языке. Это - то же самое как Привет на вашем языке
Forseti: =
TheDarkFlame: Do I mean interesting?
awalters: yup he knows so technically it is sileneable...but meh
Forseti: How dare you say such a thing, good sir?
Forseti: Как ты смеешь так говорить, батюшка? = How dare you say such a thing, good sir?
Tioga: father*
Tioga: Not good sir
muthafaker2: how
Forseti: сказать это
muthafaker2: How dare you say such a thing good sir
Forseti: LOL
Oathness: awesome
muthafaker2: yes or no ?
Forseti: yes
Tioga: mutha, Hello средства привет
muthafaker2: yes!
muthafaker2: How dare you say such a thing good sir
Tioga: TDF got ownt
Oathness: i am loling.
Forseti: ^
TheDarkFlame: This is the most brilliant moment.
lovermans: im back
Forseti: If I had a journal of my life moments
Forseti: this would be in it.
muthafaker2: hello
Tioga: This would be first
Tioga: Woo
Tioga: He sai dhello
todbot1: Somebody's got to screenshot the chat or something, seriously.
Forseti: Yes.
Tioga: sad*
Tioga: Chat log go
ninjawarrior95: hey! wat does the blood splashed on my gamer icon mean?
Forseti: Copy pasta this whole chat
Forseti: from when he came here
Tioga: Later
HappyAlcoholic: it means you're infected >:D
lovermans: fah he got infected
lovermans: dah
ninjawarrior95: lol seriusly?
Tioga: mutha, от какого страна является Вами?
todbot1: lol, he goes farther back than the chat does
Forseti: muthafaker2
muthafaker2: какие заражен и ам инфицированных?
Forseti: ха-ха-ха = lol
ninjawarrior95: wat does it mean?
muthafaker2: xaxaxa?
Forseti: darn
HappyAlcoholic: It means you're a zombie.
muthafaker2: l-o-l
lovermans: who plays runescape here
Tioga: Это - игра на вебсайте. Не волнуйтесь об этом.
awalters: he knows what a zombie is?
muthafaker2: lol
Oathness: noone.
todbot1: What do I do with this? Just save it somewhere?
Oathness: runescape sucks.
Forseti: Это значит, смеяться
Tioga: tod, keep logging it
Tioga: save it for later
muthafaker2: что означает lol??
ninjawarrior95: OMG WAT DOES IT MEAN!!!???
Tioga: When we prove Fors is god
lovermans: u say runescape sucks coz ur a noob in it
Forseti: lol
Forseti: blood thinks i'm jesus
Forseti: @_@
Forseti: muthafaker2
Tioga: People think we are the same person
Forseti: yes
Tioga: Which we are.
Oathness: no, dude
Oathness: i have a level 91.
Oathness: it sucks.
Forseti: yes muthafaker2
lovermans: lol
Forseti: xa-xa-xa = lol
muthafaker2: gtg
TheDarkFlame: Runescape is too repetitive to be a decent game.
lovermans: then if u don't like it then can i have it
Forseti: oh god damn it
Tioga: Откуда Вы?
awalters: ah got to go...interesting
Oathness: no
Oathness: no you cannot have it
Oathness: i am planning on selling it
Tioga: Откуда Вы? = Where are you from?
Forseti: свидания
Forseti: oops
Forseti: до свидания
todbot1: I'm really going to go now... Somebody else save this maybe? lol.
awalters: one is bye one is goodbye...interesting
awalters: I am
Forseti: I will save it all
Forseti: beginning to end
Forseti: shit was so cash
Tioga: mutha, Откуда Вы?
Tioga: WAS?
Tioga: Still IS.
Forseti: he left
Forseti: :/
todbot1: aww
Tioga: ..
Oathness: aww

The Typo Fail KingEdit


Blood_BathxX: he can't read a cock probs

Blood_BathxX: clock*

Blood_BathxX: i meant dock dammit

Blood_BathxX: **** it


Blood_BathxX: I wank up at 7:00 evrey mroning.

Blood_BathxX: morning*

Blood_BathxX: waek*

Blood_BathxX: wake*


Blood_BathxX: 36 is 69-36

Oathness: blood

Oathness: that's 33.

Oathness: you're an idiot.

Blood_BathxX: ....****


Blood_BathxX: hey i cnak ind of readt hat'

Note: We have no idea what that meant. My money is on "Why can't I read a hat?"

crush748: its obviously "hey i can kind of read that"

Keyboard fails

Blood_BathxX: *smashes aig with his club*
todbot1: rats live on no evil star.
KaluzaKlein: ._.
mordermor: don't **** with the monkeys
Aiglet1: *dodges*
todbot1: It's true.
Aiglet1: It's my bridge now bitch.
Blood_BathxX: *smashes kar with his club7
iamtadakatsu: why should i no mwss wiuth moinkeys
xRawr: D:
Blood_BathxX: NO IT ISNT
Blood_BathxX: **** RYOU
Blood_BathxX: UOI
Blood_BathxX: YOU
Aiglet1: CLub 7!
todbot1: lmao
Blood_BathxX: **** YOU.
Blood_BathxX: ITS LIKE 2.
mordermor: rats live in the fair trade shop next to my work
KaluzaKlein: ...
Aiglet1: Having trouble blood?
todbot1: You hate ryu?
xRawr: :l
Blood_BathxX: BOARD
Aiglet1: Hehe.
Aiglet1: KEYBARDS.
Blood_BathxX: SHUT UP :(
todbot1: Oh my god lol wtf
Blood_BathxX: *throws tod at aig*
Aiglet1: *sits on some car keys and sings*
Aiglet1: Im a keybard!
Blood_BathxX: gtfo
todbot1: Too...goddamn...funny
xRawr: lol.
todbot1: seriously
KaluzaKlein: what is this I don't even
todbot1: It's hilarious
KaluzaKlein: ^
Aiglet1: Alas, the blood he did fail us, with the troll club he did so wrong.
xRawr: It is.
KaluzaKlein: Go to sleep then?
Blood_BathxX: alnmost fone
Aiglet1: Do it.
Blood_BathxX: almost
Blood_BathxX: done
mordermor: vampires sucks :D
xRawr: dun sleeep
Blood_BathxX: with soda
Aiglet1: ALNOST!
KaluzaKlein: lolfone
Blood_BathxX: SHUT UP;.
KaluzaKlein: k
todbot1: You're a phone?
Blood_BathxX: NO
Aiglet1: We made him cry a little.
KaluzaKlein: Ima go to sleep now
KaluzaKlein: night all
todbot1: Almost a phone?
todbot1: Night Kaluza
Blood_BathxX: nifgt
Blood_BathxX: gnight
KaluzaKlein: lawl BB
todbot1: NIFGT
Blood_BathxX: **** ity
Blood_BathxX: it
Aiglet1: Ni fgt.
Oathness: blood
todbot1: Knife get
Blood_BathxX: nah'\\\\\
Blood_BathxX: ...
Blood_BathxX: me
Oathness: i could type coherently even if i couldnt see the keyboard
Blood_BathxX: ...what the **** was i typing
Aiglet1: I was thinking No fgt, tod.
Blood_BathxX: I DON'T CARE
Oathness: i am closing my eyes at the moment
Aiglet1: I cant see my keyboard.
Oathness: HOLY GOD
Blood_BathxX: SHUT UP
Blood_BathxX: **** YOU
Aiglet1: NO U.
Blood_BathxX: here
Oathness: blood rapes children
xRawr: :l
iamtadakatsu: question: what does "big" mean to you?
todbot1: my eyes are closed right now
todbot1: whoo
mordermor: type with your banana
Aiglet1: *alter boys.
Oathness: i have no banana
Blood_BathxX: this next second will be typed with my eyes closed
Aiglet1: Be specific Oats.
xRawr: lol..
Blood_BathxX: ]
todbot1: woow
Oathness: ....
Oathness: nice
Aiglet1: What?
xRawr: Blood you suck.
todbot1: That's pro
Oathness: he got one word right
Oathness: 'joel'
xRawr: xD
mordermor: thats because blood scared off all the monkeys
Blood_BathxX: i got joel right
todbot1: Second = sentence?
Oathness: and maybe 'yo ho yo'
todbot1: XD
Blood_BathxX: noo
Aiglet1: Wait, Blood is a pirate?
Oathness: heh
Blood_BathxX: i don't know what i was typing
Blood_BathxX: here
Oathness: :|
Blood_BathxX: let me try again
HappyAlcoholic: He's a butt-pirate.
Aiglet1: Bloody butt pirate!
todbot1: Somebody save this chat, seriously
todbot1: Copy it and save it somewhere
Aiglet1: *hi5 HA*
xRawr: :l
Aiglet1: Ytof?
HappyAlcoholic: *high fives*
Aiglet1: Who's Ytof?
Oathness: putting this on ftd wiki
HappyAlcoholic: Save it in the FtD wiki.
Blood_BathxX: tod
HappyAlcoholic: Oh, sweet.
Oathness: :|
Blood_BathxX: ytod is tod
Aiglet1: Wait, I thought Rawr and blood were like, going out.
Blood_BathxX: yes
Blood_BathxX: going outside
Oathness: from where, happy?
xRawr: what
Blood_BathxX: its a dangerous thing to do
todbot1: Joel and Aig and me and kal and everyone else besides...rawr?
Blood_BathxX: yes
todbot1: And then... wtf is the last two words
Blood_BathxX: ****ing suck
Oathness: aficlon sicl.
ashleyiscoool: !!'
Aiglet1: Aficlon sicl
Blood_BathxX: hey i cond of fogt the last word
Aiglet1: Yitish?
Oathness: ....
Aiglet1: ...
xRawr: ^^
Oathness: cond of fogt?
HappyAlcoholic: They are, Aiglet1.
Blood_BathxX: KIDN OF GOT
Oathness: happy
HappyAlcoholic: For some random reason...
xRawr: kind of got?
Blood_BathxX: ****ing caps
Aiglet1: Im not sure how to respond to him.
HappyAlcoholic: Yes, Oathness?
Oathness: how far up do you want me to save on the wiki
Blood_BathxX: og **** toueslef
todbot1: I'm going to end up waking somebody up with my laughing, seriously
Aiglet1: All of it.
HappyAlcoholic: Put it down the bottom, with the other convos.
Oathness: how much is all of it x.x
Aiglet1: Hahaha.
Blood_BathxX: THSI ISN'T FUNN Y'
Blood_BathxX: DON'T AKUFGH
Blood_BathxX: LAUG
Blood_BathxX: H
xRawr: :l
Oathness: ....
Aiglet1: Oat, as soon as blood started talking.
todbot1: ^
Oathness: :|
Oathness: where is this
Oathness: brb
Joshhh: don't make me pop a cap in yo ass
Blood_BathXX On Geography
See below link for the beautiful undeniable evidence of BB's massive IQ.

Thorstein, QQ moarEdit

Thorstein: a winner isn't your mom, bitch, screw this game (He was playing Tower of Greed.)

Thorstein: because there's nothing to do except play Kong and listen to Gorillaz at this hour

Thorstein: ...and sip on my bourban...

Thorstein: that's not a game, that's a chat room... fool

LOLOW: asshole

Thorstein: your mom

LOLOW: what about her

Thorstein: she is an a**hole

LOLOW: **** off caus shes dead

Thorstein: ROFL

Riker1990: this is childish at best, you know?

Thorstein: don't say childish, his mommys dead

Riker1990: no, i mean the whole situation

Thorstein: he started it;.


Riker1990: thorstein, please unmute juze

Thorstein: Jews is unmuted.

JetLag: I am 12 and what is this primary school behaviour?

Thorstein: the best porn site ever dude.

Thorstein: (jk)

LOLOW: (White text, use Ctrl + A for an example to see the text)

Juze: Yus, you all have been just copy pastad to the Wiki

Thorstein: "pastad"?

Juze: Yes, copy pasta

Thorstein: ...LOLOW you can't do that dude

To JetLag: Please do something already

JetLag: olol weekban

Thorstein: straight up, that's illega;

Thorstein: JetLag i have a question

Thorstein: dude up there asked "i am 12 what is this?" is there anything wrong with me saying "the best porn site ever" or is that against rules too?

A little bit later...

Stev0: Thors = trolls. yes

Thorstein: and Stev0, please refrain from trying to troll me

Oathness: he thinks people calling him a troll (truth) makes them a troll (false)

Riker1990: oh, shut up about the porn already, its not funny

You both suck.Edit

JudeMaverick: Umm... JetLag sucks?

JetLag: Yes

JetLag: wainou

JudeMaverick: good

All Hail Nabb. The Almighty One. Edit

A loooooong log from FTD on Sunday, January 10, 2010. Started with Tioga trying to get Nabb's attention to ask a question about one of his games (Hash), and turned into an hour long joke. Was fun until Jabor came in to break it up. :(

Bluesharpie had nothing to do with this.

Sinapi lol'd for the fifteen minutes it took to read this log, and for an additional half hour after.

All Hail Dicks, The Not-So Mighty.Edit

Another long-ish log from FtD on Saturday, March 20, 2010, the sequel to "All Hail Nabb. The Almighty One.". Started with a single person saying the word "cock", and the rest of the room took it from there. It was still fun when babyclaws broke it up.

Sinapi is mildly ashamed of her behaviour.